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On Measuring Success

From the moment sperm melded with egg, before we had a mind of our own, success has been the driving force of our lives. Is it possible that we could have survived as long as we have without that driving force? How would our lives be different without that inborn desire to succeed? Is there anything of value to be learned by our struggle for success? Or is it the struggle itself from which we derive the greater lesson? Success is simply one of two possible outcomes in any given endeavor, and the only thing it really teaches is that, through trial and error, A plus B equals C. It is through failure that lessons are learned and successes appreciated. Failure, therefore, is by far a better teacher.

Success inevitably leads to complacency, whereas failure allows for continued growth. In most instances success is coupled with a feeling of personal satisfaction; a young man who, seeing the poverty of his parents, shakes off the yolk of welfare, and works toward a better life, bringing his family with him; a young girl, pregnant at fifteen, refusing to follow in her own mother's footsteps, stays in school, despite the struggle, and makes a better life for her and her child. By rising above their own mistakes, as well as those of their parents, they succeed through trial and personal growth. Had success been given to them, they could not have grown through the experiences that led them from point A to point "there." No one gets "there" without some measure of both success and failure, but failure lets one grow from the experience. On the other hand, if only viewed as the just recompense of every drop of sweat on our heated brows, success becomes a hollow victory with no real lesson learned. Having won the race, and the crown of success received, what then do we do? Do we sit back on our laurels and allow our peers to praise our strength and persistence? Or do we humbly accept their praise and give testimony to the trials we faced and overcame to arrive at the moment? Every stumble and fall then becomes the foundation upon which our success is built and we are enriched by every cut and bruise.

Every success is built upon those failures that triggered in our minds a desire for critical analysis. In other words, were it not for failure, what would drive us to analyze the roads that led to our successes? When a plan doesn't work, what do we do? We ask ourselves why, and upon discovering the why, we then alter our plan and try again. Failure makes us sit down and critique our performance. It gets the right half of our brains in gear; weighing each action and word, analyzing every aspect before offering new tactics and solutions. Should we succeed on our first attempt, we are denied this process; why expend energy analyzing a success, especially if it's one that need not be repeated? Few people will bother trying, but without any critical analysis of our successes we will never know what, exactly, allowed us the victory. How then can we ever hope to win again? Without such understanding every successive success becomes nothing more than a stroke of blind luck; a fluke, and as such, a greater failure.

But failure, like individual perception, is uniquely subjective, in that it allows one to choose between the glass half empty and the glass half full. It's certainly possible to become a successful pessimist, but wouldn't the "other guy" enjoy his success more? This is a matter of perspective. Is the glass half-empty or half-full? Or is it fully half-empty? Do you dwell on failures or successes? Or are your failures indelibly linked with your successes? George Santayana once said, "Those who do not remember the past are doomed to repeat it." The Bible says the sins of a father are passed down to his children. We must learn from the past and carve our own paths, analyzing and deliberating each step. Forget perception! It clouds the waters of fact, allowing one thing to look much like another. Being human, if we cannot trust ourselves, how then can we trust our perceptions of success and failure? Who cares if the glass is half-empty or half-full? It's neither! It's fully half empty! By learning to judge our failures objectively we learn to appreciate success. But this is an individual lesson. A lesson every man, woman and child must learn for themselves.

Ultimately, success is an ideal, and as varied as every heart that ever held one. But many people feel like failures in their lives. Perhaps this is why many look to others for validation is because they haven't learned how to persist. Or perhaps they haven't learned how to recognize their success. But without failure, success cannot be truly appreciated. After all, how can one call himself successful without the yardstick of his failures by which to measure them?

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